2001 Honda Stepwgn

CRAZY JDM #13

This is the Honda Stepwgn. And no, that was not a typo, this is the Honda Stepwgn - extra emphasis on the 'WGN' required for the sake of authenticity. Though introduced in 1995, the 2001 Stepwgn was where things really got crazy; by that I mean it began to look tacky instead of dreary. Despite all of this, I like the Stepwgn, even if it has sliding doors on only one side for some quirky reason.



DON'T HONDA HAVE A MILLION AND ONE OF THESE TYPES OF CARS ALREADY?
Yes, and that's why it exists! You see, around this time the SUV trend was beginning. You know, the Land Rovers and Jeeps were beginning to being used as picking-the-kids-up-from-school-on-time machines as opposed to the messing-up-the-countryside-leaking-red-diesel-everywhere machines which they were supposed to be. Honda wanted to get some money out of this fad so their solution was the Stepwgn, basically a big boxy van with windows that had been made higher up so you can get the kids out without breaking your spine or something. It has 4 seating arrangements: cargo mode; sleep mode; food mode (don't question it) and play mode where the seats swivel because that's every kid's ultimate epitome of enjoyment. Despite now having many more cars that do the same job, Stepwgn is still being made. Why this is remains one of the great unsolved mysteries of our time but I reckon it has something to do with Honda's abnormally large fake chrome supply.

HOW FAST?
I''m not sure you would find this useful but it's a VTEC so it should have some grunt.
157.81119485bhp (Very specific figure because maths).
0-60 in 8.5 seconds (not bad at all for a car this size).
118mph (Limited).

MORE PHOTOS PLEASE!

Yes, someone lowered Honda's deliberately raised car - clever.

Remember when I talked about all that fake chrome? ...Yeah.

Because nothing says JDM like a van resembling a (surprisingly classy) kitchen appliance.

It looks like an old Volvo from this view.

Now you can drool over that leather. Not sure if it's real leather or fake leather though.

CAN I BUY ONE?

Too new to be imported to the USA but everywhere else expect to see prices from £2,000 to £6,000 for a 2nd generation car like the on this post (I'll cover the other ones another time). Use a currency converter if you need to covert to a different currency, price excludes importing price (obviously).

CRAZY JDM RATING!

Silly styling? NO

Silly engineering? NO

Silly idea behind it? YES

●◦◦1/3 A mostly sober car with a couple of cool and different features.

2000 Toyota WiLL Vi, 2001 Toyota WiLL VS & 2002 Toyota WiLL Cypha/VC

CRAZY JDM #10, #11 & #12

This is the Toyota WiLL. It spawned three generations, each of them wacky in their own way (see photo gallery). Pictured is the 1st gen WiLL, the WiLL Vi, purposely made to look like a Citroën Ami made from corrugated plastic. The next one, the WiLL VS, looked like the 2014 Vauxhall Astra - Yet the WiLL VS was made about a decade earlier. Oh, and there was one more WiLL, but that one was just silly.



WHAT WERE TOYOTA SMOKING?
Kao's WiLL OneWeek Room Freshener. Probably.
You see, the whole WiLL agenda wasn't just Toyota's thing. Several Japanese companies such as Panasonic and a lot of other ones that not many people outside of Japan know about worked to together to form the WiLL campaign marketed towards the youth. Because only truly youthful people drink Asahi WiLL Sweet Brown Beer, munch on Ezaki Gilco's WiLL black beans candy and operate on Panasonic's WiLL fax machine and attached headset. The youth will always drive what could be seen as one of the ugliest cars in the century, the Toyota WiLL, the vehicle that would drive you insane if it were your permanent car. For the youth.

HOW FAST?
Using the 1.3 litre engine it gets from the old Yaris, here are some estimates...
88bhp
A top speed near 100mph
0-60 in over 10 seconds.

MORE PHOTOS PLEASE!

Toyota's 'inspiration' - a Citroën Ami.

And... Soft top! You wouldn't want to be seen in that though.

The WiLL VS, a more angular Astra made about 10 years earlier.

Seriously, compare the little things like that rear window.

The final gen WiLL, The WiLL Cypha. The really very silly one. To put it bluntly, it's a bit chubby.

CAN I BUY ONE?

The fact that you ask that is rather odd. If you're in the US, then it's too new to be imported. If you're not, then you can buy one ready to import for £1,000 to 3,000, or second/third generation one £3,000 to £5,000. Use a currency converter to change to your desired currency.

I used the word 'desired' in the same article as the Toyota WiLL. Wow.

CRAZY JDM RATING!

Silly styling? YES YES YES YES YES!!!!!

Silly engineering? NO

Silly idea behind it? YES

●●◦2/3 Although it's not the most bonkers JDM, it's close.

...As sober as Asahi's WiLL Sweet Brown Beer at least.

2008 Honda Vamos Hobio Travel Dog

CRAZY JDM #4

This is the Honda Vamos Hobio Travel Dog. And no, I'm not kidding. This is a kei car, one of those Japanese economy vehicles with limited size, power and no VTECs. In fact it's a trim level of the Honda Vamos 'kei van' based on the Honda Acty 'kei truck.' This is a trim level designed for (owners of) dogs.


WHAT WERE HONDA THINKING!?
Honda were thinking of Dog owners.
A tiny noddy van for very big dogs. JDM Logic. See the photos page for more info.

HOW FAST?
There are actually performance figures for this! Let's compare with an actual dog.
Travel Dog; 44bhp. Actual dog can't fit on a dyno, maybe it has 'Dog Power' instead of HP.
Travel Dog; 0-60 in 25.7 seconds. Actual dog can't make it to 60.
Travel Dog; 73mph.  World's fastest dog is 28mph slower. But the Honda is way too slow.

MORE PICTURES PLEASE!

Well, you asked for more pictures.

Wipeable and anti-bacterial interior.

Aww, look at the adorable carpet.

Honda's free (and maybe patented) Dog-Hammock.

And to end it all we have a Dog-Bag. Looks kinda cramped to me.

CAN I BUY ONE?

Well it's growing on me now a bit. Despite that I still don't have the desire to buy one and if you do tough, this is an exclusive 2008 model so it's very rare, a normal Vamos is very common in Japan but even then it's not past the US import cap.

CRAZY JDM RATING!

Silly styling? YES

Silly engineering? YES

Silly idea behind it? CERTAINLY

●●●3/3 A very silly car that also manages to be something really cool and unique.

2004 Toyota Porte

CRAZY JDM #3
This is the Toyota Porte. It is a sort of mini people carrier based on the Yaris but don't let that put you off. The Porte has a single sliding door on the left and rear seats that slide all the way back so you can stretch your legs without touching the front seats! (Doing that does nukes the boot space though). This car is aimed at people in wheelchairs due to its accessibility and because Toyota said so.


SO IT'S LIKE A PEUGEOT 1007 THEN?
Well it's based off a small car like the 1007. It has sliding doors like the 1007. It made its début in 2004 just like the 1007. But even though it may not seem that original, Toyota has improved over the 1007 in a very important way: it's quirkiness has a point as it is made to be useful for the disabled. In fact, it still manages to look cool and unlike the 1007, is continued being made today in 2014.
That's a lot of 4 digit numbers.

HOW FAST?
You asked that about this car? Fine, here's the specs for the '06 model with the 130i engine.
86bhp
No data for the rest though, try to look at a similar sized car with the same engine, I honestly don't know. Oh and don't look at a BMW 130i's engine. :)

MORE PHOTOS PLEASE!

Accessibility example. 

Interior view shown in a very weird commercial for it.

Sister model called the 'Spade' (above) and newer Porte (below).

New model in detail.

Modified one because... it exists!

CAN I BUY ONE?

If you're in the USA then its too new to be imported otherwise you can import one for £2,000 to 12,000. Alternatively go and buy a 1007.

CRAZY JDM RATING!

Silly styling? NO

Silly engineering? YES

Silly idea behind it? YES

●●◦2/3 Although it's not the most bonkers JDM, it's close.